


Aftermath

by RoseNox98



Series: Partners in Crime [5]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Follows Canon, Levi's greiving, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, after acwnr, for like one line - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-06
Updated: 2016-04-06
Packaged: 2018-05-31 15:03:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6475000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseNox98/pseuds/RoseNox98
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi deals with the outcome of his first time beyond the walls.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aftermath

Levi was numb on the ride back to the walls, not even feeling the cold rain that soaked his clothes.  
  
He was covered in blood-human, as it wasn't steaming away-and he didn't know who it belonged to.  
  
The thought that it was Farlan's made the dark haired man's chest ache, a deep hurt that that Levi suspected even scalding water couldn't wash away.  
  
This was his fault.  
  
Isabel and Farlan would still be alive if he had just stayed by their side.  
  
He hardly heard the bells that signaled their return, the faces of the crowd blurred.  
  
The only faces he could see were his friends', Isabel's bloodstained, wide eyes and blank, and Farlan's-  
  
Levi shook the thought away, feeling a sob work up in his throat.  
  
It wouldn't due to break down in public. He could mourn their loss when he was alone.  
  
He went to the barracks as soon as they got back to the base, scrubbing at the already clean floors until his hands were raw.  
  
No one stopped him, the other soldiers that lived their leaving when they saw him.  
  
Levi tried to not let that get to him.  
  
Isabel and Farlan were the two people in the world that trusted him, the only two people he had let in after his mother died. And now they were gone, too.

Pain flared bright and hot in his chest, sharp like knives, and Levi sucked in a sharp breath, rugged and tight on the exhale.

A glance out of the window showed that night had fallen without him noticing, and he knew that the other men would be back from supper any minute.

Levi cleaned up quickly, putting his things away before he dared run his hands over Farlan’s belongings. They were his now, Levi supposed. He _was_ Farlan’s next of kin in the documents Erwin had made them sign.

He grabbed the canvas bag, feeling the heavy weight of the bottle of whisky within, and left the room.

He wandered around the compound, not really sure where he was going until he found himself outside of the stairway that lead up to the roof of the tallest building.

He climbed the steps and walked to the edge, half considering just jumping.

The thought was gone before it was even fully formed. Farlan would kill him all over again if he didn’t go down fighting.

Levi sat down; the sight of the clearing sky stretching beyond the Wall hollow now that he didn’t have anyone to look at it with.

The three of them had sat in the same place just the night before; dreaming about what freedom would taste like.

Now all Levi tasted was the harsh sting of liquor burning down his throat, grief clinging to his skin like the ash from the still burning pyres.

The first broken sound left his lips with half the bottle gone, Farlan’s shirt clutched tightly to his chest

His scent still clung thickly to the threads, and the familiar smell made Levi break all over again.

Levi glared up at the moon, hardly changed by the day’s events. Grip tightening on Farlan’s shirt and whisky still burning his throat, Levi made a vow.

 “I’m not going to let your deaths be in vain, I promise.”

He breathed in deeply, letting it out in a rush. “I’ll make sure that every last Titan is dead, even if I have to kill them all myself.”

He would train until he couldn’t move if he had to, but he had to get stronger.

He didn’t see the man standing in the shadows, sharp blue eyes wet with tears.

The guilt of Farlan and Isabel’s deaths wasn’t on Levi’s shoulders alone.

Levi was his would-be assassin, but Erwin didn’t see that in him.

The assassin had died with his friends.

This Levi was a broken man who had just lost everything, and Erwin would try his best to help him pick up the pieces.


End file.
